My Journey on Whole30 when I had a drinking problem
I have been a strong believer and advocate of the Whole30 for about three years. I completed my first Whole30 way back in September 2013. I then completed another one in January 2014. Then again in March 2014. Then in September 2014 I completed my first Whole60. Then again in January 2015 I completed a Whole30. Then in March of 2015, I got crazy and completed a Whole82. It was to be a Whole100, but we built a house and one of our good friends, and new neighbors brought over a bottle of champagne and of course I was not properly celebrating this amazing life event if I did not drink any champagne.
After my Whole60 and then my Whole82 I had lost a total of 30 pounds. I was the same size I was at my fittest in college - even lower weight than my wedding. I felt amazing and loved the Whole30 lifestyle. But, in May of 2015 is where my story turns. It’s no longer a story about Whole30’s it’s a story about dependence on alcohol - a drinking problem.
For the last year, my story looks like this:
July 2015 attempted Whole30 - took a drink after ten days.
September 2015 attempted Whole30 - took a drink after 16 days
October 2015 attempted Whole30 - took a drink after four days
January 2016 attempted Whole30 - took a drink after 11 days
March 2016 attempted Whole30 - took a drink after 17 days
April 2016 attempted Whole30 - took a drink after ten days
June 2016 attempted Whole30 - took a drink after seven days
Wow, was I defeated. Back during my Whole82 I proudly declared that I no longer drank alcohol. I was a non-drinker and figured I would stay that way. I realized that alcohol did not align with the life I wanted to live and if I was going to reach my fullest potential I needed to say goodbye to alcohol. This is where I would say I began to realize I may have a problem with drinking - dependence on alcohol. In a not healthy way. In a way, that would slowly drag me down. That would turn me into the person that needed an intervention.
But, alcohol’s power to you is so strong. It’s like I realized that I no longer wanted alcohol as a part of my life back in March 2015, but by June 2015 it had other plans for me. It took me down. It kept bringing me down. No matter how much I desired to give up alcohol for good, I kept going back to it. It’s a long journey to realize you need to never take a drink again. I was attempting to utilize Whole30 to moderate my drinking, but clearly, that did not work.
When you have a drinking problem, and you are trying to complete a Whole30 - it’s excruciating. For me, it was such a cycle of defeat. Hopelessness.
I’m completing another Whole30 but this time, I’m sober. I am completing this one not to moderate my alcohol, but to heal my body. To focus clean food, good sleep and allow myself to feel my emotions without using anything to hide them or distract me from them.
I am so ready to be back where I was during my Whole82 - down 30 pounds and full of hope and energy. Because over the last year, those 30 pounds came back. I’m ready to be my healthiest and stay that way, not slowly slip back down to that hopeless, controlled by alcohol person I was in June.
Have you ever completed a Whole30?
Have you had any sober life victories lately?